I Am A Traitor To Cabbages Everywhere

I've been a self-professed Discordian for almost a year now, and I recently came to wonder why I chose to follow a psychobabble-based philosophy. Or, more accurately, I came to ponder the irony of it.

I'm cut from the very mold that mid-level managers and executives are: conscientious, task-oriented (as opposed to goal-oriented), and I like having my work cut out for me. Creativity is an auxiliary function, a tool best used by the select few and always for a specific purpose. In other words, my character makes me more than the typical workplace drone, more than an obedient servant of "The System". No, I'm an enthusiastic servant of The System; the one who can be set to work like a machine, and desires nothing better than to see everyone else do the same. I am exactly who the Discordians, the SubGenii, and their ilk (i.e. those who associate with both but act all superior about being an 'outsider') chafe under: not the grand masterminds of The System, but their tool, their Elite Cabbage Guard.

Or I would be, if it weren't for the fact that I'm not any such thing. I'm merely suited to that position so well that it should give freethinkers and, in the words of Illuminatus!, neophiles a little shiver just thinking about it. Heck, I'm even an antiquarian, which I can prove by making use of words like 'antiquarian,' and I only liked the Principia Discordia and Illuminatus! because they smacked of something from an older generation than my own. It just so happened that their ideas were just old and obscure enough to seem fascinating to me, but loony enough to appeal to my sense of humor.

So why am I on your side? (Let's face it, you probably wouldn't be reading this if you weren't one of those types of people I just mentioned.) I don't really know, but let's all be glad that I turned down Their offer to be a wealthy, overworked, and soulless mind slave.

In other news, I have once again managed to update this blog in just under a month. Seems to be a cycle.