Monday, February 9, 2009

"Twilight" Vampirism Is Bullshit

Vampires are allowed to have the following powers:

1) Faster and stronger than humans, but not superhuman
2) If the vampire in question is Dracula, then he can shape-shift into a bat or wolf (iirc)

And that's it.

Vampires are also required to have the following weaknesses:

1) Daylight fucking KILLS them. DEAD. Circumventing this is not fucking allowed.
2) Garlic
3) Wooden stake through the heart
4) Catholic stuff


Granting extra powers or removing weaknesses disqualifies them as vampires. They become fantasy fanwankery if they break the rules, and it becomes necessary to mock them endlessly. Being a vampire is supposed to be a curse, damn it, not a level-up.

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